I just poured some vodka. I have a reasonable sized headache so I doubt I’ll type much tonight, but hopefully vodka can cure headaches tonight. The news is overwhelmed with news about Russian interference in the election to help Trump. I’m skeptical that Russian interference played that big of difference in the outcome of the election, but I also don’t doubt that they were quite possibly involved and invested in a Trump victory. My irritation today stems from the response among leftists which seems to just be now Americans know how it feels to have their elections fucked with just like the American government has done for the six or seven decades. Undoubtedly some of the outrage of Russian attempts to change the election is a bit overblown and hypocritically hysterical, but if you believe in democratic government and that foreign interference in elections is a problem then it’s both a problem when the American government does it and when the Russia government. The argument that Americans have no right to complain because they haven’t been loudly condemning or trying to prevent American interference is silly. Sure, obviously the world would be a better place if Americans care more about the ugly reality of our foreign policy especially interfering in elections to get an outcome that is geopolitically advantageous in the minds our security policy elites or to our corporations, but ultimately it’s only human to care more about something when it happens to you. You can condemn the lack of concern about American foreign policy and the actions of Russia in American and European elections, and Syria, without contradicting yourself. It seems to a lot of American and western leftists condemning American policy around the world has become blinding to the flaws of much of the rest of the world. It’s true that the power, scale, and amount of activity makes American foreign policy the most important to critic and hopefully, if you can, work to improve, but Putin’s policies in eastern Europe, Syria, and Chechnya are worthy or healthy skepticism and condemnation. They aren’t the inexplicable actions of a crazy or evil man as the mainstream American press makes them out to be, but just because they’re covered in a absurdly shaded way in the American press doesn’t mean they’re good for people around the world. That’s my short rant for the day.
I’m drinking ginger infused vodka tonight, it’s pretty good. I generally drink straight vodka, but sometimes when I go to the liquor store they’ll have infused vodkas at the same price as the good stuff. I definitely recommend against drinking pepper infused vodka without a mixer, but the ginger variety is good on its own. I’m typing about my drinking preferences, so I presume it’s clear that I didn’t do much today. I spent the morning reading, I’ve been a bit derelict in my daily the last fews days so I spent most of the morning diving into Carl Hart’s book High Price. It’s a good book, though I must admit I went into it expecting less of a memoir so it took me a little time to adjust my expectations. Besides that I really just had to do some minor work stuff, cooking meals and a little transportation, and I listened to podcasts. I’ve been on a Generation Why kick for the last couple months, I’m nearly through the entire archive already. It serves as a nice distraction for me, I enjoy true crime stories when I’m paying attention but they’re not so enthralling that I don’t mind having them playing as I fall asleep. To me that fills a niche no one purposefully tries to fill, but is a fundamental need in entertainment. I watch arguably terrible television for similar reasons, sometimes your brain just needs a break from thinking about life or the world or anything with any depth and mediocre art that isn’t trying too hard is perfect for that. That’s not to say it’s a bad show, just that it’s a show that meets my love of mysteries with my long-term disinterest in the solution to them and the explanation for the ones that actually happened; I’m sure for some people it fills a different niche. I needed a day like today where I had nothing to do, but being me I couldn’t actually appreciate what I had today. I spent most of the day tired, exhausted, depressed, lonely, and ultimately wishing I could just sleep without being able to actually nap. Maybe exercising for an hour and twenty minutes every morning explains my constant exhaustion or maybe it’s just my coffee addiction catching up to me later in the day, either way I spend most afternoons incredibly tired and groggy until I force myself to move around and make dinner after which I usually feel okay for an hour or two until I collapse again until finally going to bed. I’m in currently in the middle of the second collapse that ends in my trudging myself through an hour or two of alertness before I can sleep. It’s really the perfect time for vodka, nothing to really do but sleep so you aren’t tempted to try things with a new drunken confidence and fewer anxieties to disturb the peace and warmth lonely drinkers are always seeking but rarely find. That’s my Saturday night, drinking here by myself irritated by left twitter and exhausted for no real reason but still not quite capable of sleep.